At Night, I Cry

At Night, I Cry

At night, I cry because I can’t stop thinking about the old me

When no one’s around, I weep warm tears that slide down my cheeks slowly

And it’s odd, I feel so unsatisfied but I refuse to use the word “unhappy”

I think back to the times where I would just laugh with my little friends, gleefully

Now that I’m older, I feel myself constantly over-thinking

Just constantly thinking of bad habits and fears

Maybe it’s something I did; maybe I’m the bad seed

Maybe I do deserve this horrible treatment by my peers

Or maybe I’m just doing what I do best, over-think

I do it everyday, think to the point where it sickens me

Now I’m physically sick from staring at this laptop screen, constantly

‘Cause now it seems it’s all I have left

Everyone knows what I crave but I can’t seem to do anything about it

And I can’t share my innermost thoughts with them, in-depth

Because my mom will try and do something drastic

My dad just blows it off and says somethin’ sarcastic

And my sister just believes everything is all beautiful and fantastic

And what else am I supposed to say

The very thing y’all hate, I feel the same way

But nothing ever seems to change

Even when I did complain

Now I sit here writing this rhyme

About why I cry at night