The worst competition,
Is the one that always lingers,
It never truly comes in first,
But it seems to be fighting for more than second.
The formation of this unexpected gift, weird and lovely,
It has what it isn’t, does what isn’t initially intended,
And when the words begins to flow I feel a stream of cool mojo,
The signals go through my chrome antennae imagining the senses of a lioness,
The hyper magician disguises these words in double entendres,
And let the morphemes crash down with warp speed.
These words forever untamed, this negativity always unwanted,
My stories created haphazardly but they crave strict melody,
My most vulnerable poetry is a concoction of lovely anxiety,
Ashes twisted and scattered onto the paper,
Darkness over takes me, but my poetry is savin’.
It sheds light to the night’s shade pulled over my optics,
Poetry is the key, the blade that destroys the poisonous thoughts.
I Don't Need Riches (Wealthy Spirit)I Don’t Need Riches (Wealthy Spirit)
I don’t ask to drown in riches,
I ask for wealth of spirit.
Last night, I dreamt of us.
We were together on a mountaintop,
I was sitting on the edge,
With my legs dangling above the bottomless pit,
With a lone, white chrysanthemum in my hand as I pull the petals from the stem.
While you were standing above me, looking on, languidly,
None of us wanting to say anything,
My own mental battle sewing my lips to one another,
Unable to speak,
While you were probably trapped within your own mental depths;
In my mind, I was debating between venting and jumping,
Simply over the fact I didn’t know what that look was in your eyes,
But I think that’s probably the point, that we’re no longer of the same kind,
Maybe I changed into something I’m unaware of, maybe you were the one to transform,
But I don’t get the same feel of what used to be,
This is foreign to me,
An unapologetic feeling of extreme apathy,
And that is the unfortunate reality of this situation,
No matter how long
Sole SystemSole System
Stardust means dying.
Withering ash of the flame,
And mine will not fade.
Are what I refuse to be.
I’m far more than that.
I’m a concoction,
Of blood, bones, cells and water.
The true, sole system.
What Does Love Look Like?What Does Love Look Like?
I often think about love.
I think about the shapes and forms it takes on.
And I believe it is all around us, even when humanity isn’t.
What does love look like?
It looks like the sunlight,
Rays that shine through the clouds,
Eternally keeping you warm and bright.
What does love look like?
It looks like death;
The dwindling of the physical embodiment.
Your hands may never hold each other’s again…
But the souls of true lovers will never fade, true love has no end.
What does love look like?
It looks like the tide of a sea.
The way it flows in and away,
Then back again.
Love is a like a tide that always returns back to the shore,
Because it cannot stay away for too long before it returns back to her.
Too LateToo Late
We never pay attention,
Till someone is on the edge of death,
And by the time that moment arrives,
A shaky breath has already escaped their lips for the final time.
Sometimes you need seclusion to reclaim your mind.
Blacken your vision and close your eyes,
Plug your ears from the outside,
As you fall back, back inside of “I.”
And not “we,” “he,” “she,” but me.
Sometimes to find myself,
I must lose everyone else.
10 months ago, I was a pigeon that could gain no air,
Zero flight, I was goin’ nowhere,
I was going through the motions with no advancements,
My lateral movements only wasted stamina.
Then an angel helped me find my chrome extensions,
These things morphed into thee making the most of me, these metallic wings my insignia.
Symbolism of poetic genesis that lead to the creation,
Of relations, this prosody helped create through me, from Him.
Through this, from poetry, He shines upon me with the greatest blessing.
I'm Not A Cat (Humanity's Pinnacle)I’m Not A Cat (Humanity’s Pinnacle)
Connections are the core to existence.
Correlating organisms and creations to one ground.
However, these connections will leave us eventually,
Leaving only their footprints of their entity.
And now, these connections are no longer susceptible to death.
They are susceptible to the forever; of memories meeting infinitum.
Creation being spread from generation to generation.
This is the level of immortality I wish to achieve,
Without having to die more than once.
There Is Only One Ending
There Is Only One Ending
Everyone has a purpose-- positive, neutral, and negative.
So when the “end” of something has occurred, realize this;
It isn’t the end yet ‘cause the end isn’t the closing of a relationship.
I understand it takes time to cope, but the only end you’ll experience is your final breath.
This is a realization that’s taken me 16 years to realize,
As time flies by, I’ve wished for people I’ve lost to be by my side,
But I realize their purpose in my life has run its course,
And even when this comes to a close,
It isn’t the end as traces of their being still linger on within my own,
Every lesson signifies their infinite influence on my life,
And this applies to all that live, every relationship has its purpose.
There is a lesson to be learned from every experience so never forget.
Sanguine Spills/Greying BlueSanguine Spills/Greying Blue
With my head pointed towards the nude Earth in silence,
I close my eyelids and the heavens begin to open.
Plangent ripples tear through the clouds as liquid falls,
Smell of singed skin fills my nostrils, reeking of hatred and disappointment.
His tears burn my exposed flesh; but I open my eyes.
It kills me to see ‘im cry, the searing wrath in the wake of the flood.
His tears a greying blue;
The color of the passion however,
A fueling inferno of carmine that craves lakes of sanguine spills.
Air HungerAir Hunger
Her deeds are a knife,
Slicing across me,
From the middle of my palm,
To the base of my wrist,
Splitting open threads of my skin.
Yet there is no crimson seepin’ from the slit.
i can't hold everything she does,
but i want to.
if she decided to become the sun,
i would wrap her in my arms
and let myself melt into
I feel as though I am not enough,
Yet simultaneously too much.
I hunger for the air,
Burdened by this breathlessness
As I stare the overhead down,
With yellowed eyes.
But I yearn not to the be sun,
Rather the skies.
The air that fades away as I get high.
this blood inside of me
is only half my own,
the rest replaced with my semi love
for the dirt under my fingernails and
a soul with humanity
weighing them down like
a locket filled with a wolf pack.
This emptiness sits flat on my chest,
Like a wildebeest took a seat where my heart used to be.
Leaving a crater full with my punctured lung
Tom Doesn't Say MuchTom Doesn’t Say Much
“Hey Tom, what’s up man?”
Hey bro’, nothin’ much. Just tired. I was actually think--
“Aw damn, that sucks. Gotta go.”
“Hey, I’m gonna go out with friends, wanna come with Tommy ol’ boy?”
Yeah, sure! That sounds great!
“Ooooh, sorry Tom. I didn’t think you’d want to go.”
.…But…I told you I did.
“Oh really? Damn, I’m sorry. Maybe next time.”
“Hey Tom, I’m gonna run an errand really quickly. I’ll be back in a couple hours.”
Alright, cool. So, I’ll see ya’ at 3? “Yeah, catch ya’ then.”
I’ll wait for the next 2 hours, not doing anything.
‘Cause hey, I wanna hang with people!
I’ve never been closer,
To the permanent entity,
Before in my life,
As I have been now.
This isn’t somethin’ you come to grips with,
Nor is it somethin' you handle,
With a wave of a hand, flick of the wrist,
Or bat of an eye.
You’re more like having a bat’s eyesight,
Near-blind because you can hardly see,
What’s coming to be
Nor what may arise.
It’s so fast,
Unrelenting in its pursuit,
And unwavering in its impact.
Shaking anyone who comes into contact,
With the whiff of death that consumes the air,
And constricts our breathing passages,
As you see someone you love,
Go down in flames and fadin’.
In (and out) the nebula of smoke.
Death isn’t so scary.
Just say goodbye,
(I love you.)
Before you die.
Love To GiveLove To Give
I may not be the strongest,
Or perhaps, not even the smartest,
But I always try my best to bring positivity.
To try and bring light to those who are feeling they’re alone in the dark,
And as much as I’ve felt entrapped by the darkness,
I know there’s far more to life than that depression.
And what I believe in: Is love in every form and fashion,
So I try to give it to everyone I come across,
And I promise to anyone who needs love,
That I’m here to give it for as long as you need it.
10/8i cut myself just above the knee,
a friendly reminder
as to why i can't run away anymore.
(& it's not working.)
Unintentional InnocenceUnintentional Innocence
“You know, I still don’t look at you as a teenager,”
I smile at these words my mom utters,
Knowing that’s how she’ll always look at me,
I’m not a kid on the verge of being an adult, but still her baby.
And that’s okay; I can accept that. I actually don’t mind it.
But when it starts to carry over to friendships…..
I don’t know how I really feel about that sort of dynamic,
I’m okay with the “little brother” role, but I’m not some little kid.
I’m not saying I don’t like being considered a good person
‘Cause I know I am one,
But it’s a bit odd to hear how people don’t really give me a bit more credit,
I can tell you all that I’ve heard, all that I’ve seen but then again,
I don’t think people really wanna hear my whole life story,
It’s just a little annoying how I still seem to carry an unintentional air of inno
we're all drunk and always have beenno
i haven't felt smaller than this before
and it could be
because i don't breathe poetry in
and out -
and out -
i write it under my eyebrows
with the precision
of a drunk sniper
toasted into admission
with irony s-st-tutter-ering
down his throat.
you wouldn't take a damned bullet for me.
beautiful is a word kept
for the rise
of her tidal chest,
not my shallow breath,
not my sunset, heartfelt,
i would have disappeared
between your accusing index and
neglected thumb -
don't you feel calmer?
i haven't felt smaller than this
i haven't felt smaller than this before
and it could be
because you found a home between
her stroking index and
comforting thumb -
i haven't forgotten,
no, i still remember
now twenty two penumbrae in the past
didn't stop me
in one of several crevasses
at the bottom of your oceanic mind;
you may have forgotten,
and slept in
on the details,
but i haven't,
Mistakes and Resolutions (2P!GermanyxReader)Mistakes and Resolutions
Contest Entry for 2P!Hetalia-X-Reader
"Stille Nacht, heilige Nacht!
Alles schläft, einsam wacht
Nur das traute, hochheilige Paar.
Holder Knabe im lockigen Haar,
Schlaf in himmlischer Ruh,
Schlaf in himmlischer Ruh."
The tall German man sang the song to himself, remembering the week before when his house had been made less lonely by a tall pine tree and the sound of his girlfriend's voice.
She was decorating the tree while singing the song, her crystal clear voice ringing through the air. He smiled at the sound of his girl singing a song in his native tongue. (F/n) was currently trying to place a candle holder on one of the higher branches of the tree. He smirked at her as he watched her stretch, everything about her body drawing him near.
Letting out a frustrated huff of air, the (h/c) haired girl gave up, stomping her foot on the ground. Lutz chuckled and lifted himself from his seat. Slowly, quietly, he made his way to
she sees his plane in the oceani shed layers of feeling in ink and words like a rain-soaked coat but my heavy head doesn't feel any lighter
i keep waking up in the morning but the sun doesn't seem to shine any brighter
i can't control the world can't save you just nightmares and waiting and worry
the days become nights become weeks become months -- since when did my life get so blurry?
i keep my heart in a box beneath the bed where we slept, all the memories lay undisturbed
there's a book full of lyrics and tunes of the songs that without you, id never have heard
there's a scar on your head from when they tried to defeat you, it's so easy to see it now
you still reach for your curls with your trembling hands, i wish i could stop them from shaking somehow
years have passed since they gave me the letter, and i find myself waiting for you
you might open the door with a smile on your face, and tell me that none of it's true
my doorstep grows ever colder while the seasons wear down the wood
i know you would wa
things I learned at 11 am while I was half-asleepi
I’m spending most of my time
not crying, and I’m sorry,
but I don’t think I’ll ever love anyone
as much as aspirin, or lullabies,
or the cheap wine sold for two dollars a bottle,
or overly-apologetic letters bending over backwards
to make a point of themselves, or the pink petals
blooming on my wrists like flesh and blood miracles,
or the songs named after women
things may not change,
but you will have to.
I am most alone
surrounded by people
and the buzzing in my head of words
that should have lost their meaning
back when I discovered
they never meant anything
Dedications are only relevant
to people who appreciate shitty poetry,
or you. Insanity is writing the same thing
over and over and expecting it not
to sound clichéd.
and as much as anyone will swear otherwise,
I am a statistic. A number, an example,
a case study in the manipulation of
narcissism and moving on
Nourishment“So your dad isn’t really your dad?”
“I have no evidence either way. Therefore, it is unwise to make a conclusion.” I frown at the tip of my pencil. “How do you spell your name?”
“X-U-A-N.” He glances at my paper. “Are you… making a list?”
“I don’t know why you make it sound so insensible, but yes.” I write Xuan next to a bullet point and make another point.
Do I have another point? I hadn’t even finished my toffee before the man who is not my father approached me.
Well, that means the toffee is still in my lunchbox, and I can have two toffees for lunch tomorrow. I write that down.
“…Can I ask why you’re making a list?” He hesitates before everything he says. Will Xuan ever speak to me in a normal tone of voice? Not that I am a good judge of what is and is not normal.
I bite my lip. I want to avoid the question, but that isn’t rational because th
TiredI’m so tired of
Spilling out poetry
About being broken
I have enough bandages
To build me a rope up to heaven
(Or maybe even down to hell)
Perhaps they’re culminating
In the center of my chest
That would explain the
Weight of an anvil
That can’t be shaken
I’ve got a diagnosis
For that reason why
I’ve been leaving class every day
For two grueling weeks
I’ve got meds that don’t work
And confidential conversations
And a few scabs on my leg
From when I decided
To play with scissors
I’ve got a sadness towards myself
That I can’t expel
It’s an assailant in the night
Coming and going
Impossible to trace
No one understands it
I don’t understand it
I just want it to stop.
I want to disappear
Into a book
Or a journal page
And leave behind
The inexplicable tears
I’m tired of feeling weak
When everyone is telling me
How strong I am
And feeling ugly
When people tell me
That they think I’m beautiful
And not wanting to talk
i wake to the sound
of his teeth against heaven;
shattering around his molars.
the gates groan
and it's almost enough
to drown out
the sound of his palms
moaning agains't god's will.
he touched me first,
autumn sheets aren't enough
to wash away
the imprints his fingertips left
against my waxen skin
in the heat of summer.
i just don't know why
are going to hell
because there isn't anywhere else
that would take us.
i never meant to start a war.before you fade completely
i want you to know
are Sunday night headaches
burning out my senses;
are the reason that i can't look myself in the eye.
so don't you tell me
that this is all my fault,
"you don't do this to someone you love"
because it's not my fault
i was just not close to you anymore.
there must have been a time
where i loved you
and loved you dearly,
but we wrecked that.
it's just one thing
i can't put back together
& i don't think that,
given the chance,
i would even try.
Fear of LifePlease do not fear being beneath the Earth’s soil
For that is where the seeds of flowers grow
Be patient and life will reveal its mysteries
But only when it is ready to do so
By all means take time to search for the truth
But beware, please do not become obsessed
As we only fear what we don’t understand
And what we don’t understand is but a test
A test of faith in whatever you believe
Now stand up for yourself and you cannot fail
If life is the hammer waiting to fall
Then you must refuse to be the nail
Please do not fear being above the Earth’s soil
For that is where the flowers begin to bloom
Just open your heart as their petals do
And your life will be as sweet as their perfume
You could be the change in someone’s journey
Showing them the path from incomplete to whole
Why not give someone the gift of your love
And watch as they gently unwrap your soul
Suddenly the truth will dawn upon you
To live life without fear and you cannot fail
If life is a sailboa